When Joppe was about 2 years old, I put him into the bad. Usually the bad was cold and then we added Warm water. This time it was warmer as usual. (37°C)
Joppe asked me to make it warmer.
That surpised me, as he usally likes his bath colder then what is adviced for kids.
So I added some warm water. he still did not like it. He said again, make it warmer. That happend a few times.
I wondered if he now wanted his bath temperature more as what adults want.
Still Joppe used to like his bath temperature below the adviced 37°C. I was very surprised that he would ask me to put the temperature to +39 degrees.
I decided to ignore him and to give him cold water. I saw on his face, that he liked it.
When I stopped at the usual 35°/36°c. He was happy. I was surprised, why did he mix up warm and cold?
A few days later, I read in a book, that kids at his age don’t get the concept yet of warm and cold.
The book gave a similar example, and said that for kids, “make it warmer”, actually means: make it closer to the temparature I know as warm. Where warm means: the temparature I like.
It’s a nice example of were I as a parent understand what the words are Joppe said. Only I did not know that his concept of “Make it warmer” was different from mine.
(And both are correct from our own worldview)
I am reminded of this story every time I work with different cultures.
We all have our worldview; We all think ours is correct. And yet, we have communication problems.
It’s only whe you understand what is the worldview of the others, you understand what they are saying and why.
Joppe was not harmed in this true story. He still likes his baths colder then my other kids.